


A Bird in the Hand

by fatal_drum



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Bottom Oswald Cobblepot, Desk Sex, Gags, Harvey is too smug for his own good, M/M, Oswald is the bottomiest bottom, Pet Names, Teasing, cameo from Victor Zsasz, mutual antagonism, unredeemable smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-29
Updated: 2017-11-29
Packaged: 2019-02-08 07:39:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12859911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fatal_drum/pseuds/fatal_drum
Summary: After a week of too much bullshit and not enough whiskey, Harvey lets his mouth get the better of him—with Oswald Cobblepot, no less.





	A Bird in the Hand

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Seluvia](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seluvia/gifts).



> for my dear friend Hawke, who has sucked me down the Cobblepot-loving rabbit hole.

Harvey always knew his mouth would catch up with him someday.

He just didn't think it would be today in Penguin's office.

Oswald Cobblepot leaned on his cane, watching Harvey with cold eyes. “What did you say?” he asked, his lips twisting into a sneer.

Harvey sighed. The way he saw it, he had two options. The smart option would be to back the hell off and hope Oswald got distracted before he could arrange to have Harvey murdered. Sure, he needed the information he'd come for, but it wasn't worth his goddamn life.

A smarter man would have done that, but Harvey had dealt with too much bullshit that week, and without nearly enough whiskey.

That left the second option.

“I _said_ ,” Harvey enunciated, “you're obviously not getting enough dick. Maybe if someone gave you a good seeing to, you'd stop being such a drama queen.”

Oswald spluttered, spots of color forming high on his pale cheeks. It wasn't a bad look for him; far less corpselike.

“Of all the crude, senseless—”

“Don't see you denying it.”

“That's none of your concern,” Oswald snapped.

“It could be,” Harvey said.

Oswald swallowed, looking away for a split second. “I have no idea what you are talking about.”

He was almost pretty from certain angles, Harvey realized. If you liked skinny guys who looked like they'd raided their granddad's closet and styled their hair in the dark. With a weed whacker.

Harvey stepped closer, and Oswald stepped back until his thighs brushed the back of his desk. Oswald had to tilt his head up to look at him, exposing the pale line of his throat. Harvey thought about tracing that line with his tongue, then scraping the soft skin with his stubbled jaw. He brought his gaze up from Oswald's throat to his lips, then finally his eyes.

“You need it bad, doll,” Harvey said, leaning close. “I can tell by the way you walk. You're always so tensed and stressed, and it's not just your leg. You need someone to bend you over that desk of yours and fuck you until you see _stars_.”

Oswald licked his lips nervously. “I do not—” he tried, then stopped, suddenly at a loss for words.

“You don't have to say anything,” Harvey said, resting a hand on the middle of Oswald's chest. He could feel his heart pounding through the layers of his suit. “Let's say I'm wrong. You're perfectly satisfied, don't need a thing from the likes of me.” _Bullshit_ , Harvey thought, but he continued, “All you have to do is step away. Just sit down at your desk, start doing some paperwork and ignore me.”

Oswald's pulse was racing under Harvey's palm, and he inhaled sharply as Harvey trailed a hand up his chest to cup his chin. Harvey waited for Oswald to curse him, or call his guards, or stab him with the knife everyone pretended wasn't stashed in the cane. Instead, he let Harvey touch him, glaring up at him defiantly.

 _This is a terrible fucking idea_ , Harvey realized.

It was a terrible fucking idea, but he leaned down to kiss him anyway.

The kiss was wet and dirty, a harsh clash of tongues and teeth. Oswald tasted of spiced tea, and Harvey licked the flavor from his mouth, grinding his hips against him. Oswald groaned and bit down on Harvey's lip, just hard enough to hurt.

Harvey hauled him up to sit on the desk without breaking contact. Oswald's thighs gripped Harvey's hips as he drew him closer, working his hands under Harvey's jacket. Harvey cupped Oswald's ass in both hands and squeezed, drawing a whine from his throat.

“It's okay, doll,” Harvey said, working his way down Oswald's neck with his lips and tongue. “I've got you.”

He sucked a hard bruise onto Oswald's collarbone, making him gasp. It had been a long time since Harvey had seen someone so vulnerable, so responsive to his touch. He followed up with a scrape of teeth, earning a keening cry.

Patiently, Harvey peeled Oswald out of his clothes, undoing all the little buttons on his fussy dress shirt and opening his belt. Oswald jerked when Harvey's hand brushed the front of his pants, and Harvey rubbed him through the fabric.

“Want me to take care of you?” he asked, giving him a little squeeze that earned him a low groan. The sound went straight to his cock.

Oswald swallowed and nodded, licking his lips. Harvey spread Oswald's thighs with his palms, helping him out of his pants before he reached for Oswald's dick. It fit perfectly in his hand, long and thin and uncut. He pulled back to spit into his palm before stroking him firmly, catching a bead of precome with the pad of his thumb.

Hearing a muffled groan, he looked up to see Oswald with his fingers jammed into his mouth.

“Afraid someone's gonna hear you?”

Oswald glared, withdrawing his hand to reprimand him until Harvey twisted his hand just right. Harvey grinned and kissed him again, stealing the gasp from his lips. Oswald's hands fisted in his jacket as Harvey jerked him with a practiced hand.

The sounds soon proved too much for Harvey to take; each needy little gasp went straight to his cock, which was reminding him it hadn't been touched yet. He reached down to cup Oswald's hips, drawing him closer.

“Ready for more?” he asked, squeezing Oswald's ass with both hands for emphasis.

Oswald shuddered and ground against Harvey, his cock leaving a sticky trail on the front of his slacks. Harvey groaned and pulled him closer, enjoying the weight and heat of Oswald's body against his.

Reaching into his pocket, he fished out his wallet, pulling out the condom and packet of lube he kept for luck. Oswald huffed a laugh when he saw it, but Harvey could see the flash of relief on his face. He wondered what Oswald had expected. For Harvey to shove into him with nothing but spit, not giving a fuck if he tore him, as long as he got his rocks off?

Maybe Oswald would even have let him. The thought made Harvey's jaw clench as he pushed him down onto the desk to stand between his splayed legs. For a moment, Oswald's expression flickered with something unreadable, and Harvey realized he was gripping Oswald's hips tighter than he intended. He forced his hands to relax, running a palm down Oswald's bare thigh. Oswald let out a slow, deep sigh.

Harvey opened the lube and spread it across his fingertips, slipping them down between Oswald's thighs until he gasped. He could feel the tight muscle quiver as he circled around, just barely breaching it with a fingertip. Oswald raised his hips to meet him, and he slid farther in.

Suddenly he felt himself being pulled against the desk, Oswald's thighs clamping around him. His finger slipped in a little deeper, but he pulled his hand back.

“Greedy little thing, aren't you?” Harvey asked, feeling his cock twitch in his pants. He had the most powerful man in Gotham spread across his own desk, hungry for _him_. It was a dangerous feeling, bound to see him at the bottom of Gotham Harbor, but fuck if he was going to stop _now_.

Oswald was livid. “Of all the useless, moronic—”

Harvey slid his fingertip into Oswald again, making him stop with a gasp before pulling back to tease the tight ring of muscle. Oswald's hips bucked, but Harvey pinned him down with one hand.

“S-stop lollygagging and do what you promised,” Oswald snapped.

Harvey chuckled, squeezing Oswald's hip.

“Sorry, what was it you wanted? You'll have to refresh my memory, seeing as I'm such a useless _moron.”_ He punctuated his statement by pressing his fingertip against Oswald's entrance.

Oswald whined, squirming against his grip. Harvey swatted his ass, but that just made him writhe even more.

“Ask nice or I won't do it,” Harvey said, rubbing his still-clothed cock against him just to show what he was missing.

“ _F-fuck,”_ Oswald groaned, eyes squeezing shut.

“What was that, doll?” Harvey ground down against Oswald's ass, letting him feel exactly how much cock he wasn't getting.

“P-please fuck me. Your fingers, your cock, I—”

Say what you would about Harvey Bullock, but he was a man of his word. The second he heard the magic word, he was sliding into Oswald until his knuckles met skin. Oswald rocked against him, keening.

“You like that?” Harvey asked, sliding in a second finger. Oswald nodded hungrily, licking his lips. His pupils were blown wide as he took everything Harvey gave him and fought for more. Harvey crooked his fingers carefully, feeling around for—

 _Fuck_. Oswald clenched around him like a vise, groaning deep in his throat when Harvey found his sweet spot. Harvey stroked it again, watching drops of precome gather at the tip of Oswald's cock.

“ _Enough_!” Oswald groaned, eyes squeezed shut. “I need more. Give it to me, please, just—”

Harvey shushed him, running his free hand down Oswald's side. “Easy there, sweetheart. I've got you.”

Harvey pulled out gently, opening his pants as fast as he could with slick fingers. He groaned when the cool air hit his cock.

“My goodness,” Oswald said.

Harvey looked up to find Oswald's gaze transfixed on his cock, tongue darting out to wet his lips.

“Like what you see?” he asked, running a loose fist up and down his cock.

Oswald made a small, choked noise. Harvey decided to take pity on him and get to business, rolling the condom onto his cock and slicking it up.

“You sure you want this?” he asked, running the tip of his cock down Oswald's crack.

“If you don't fuck me this _instant_ , Detective Bullock, I will—”

Oswald didn't have a chance to spell out his threat because Harvey was already sliding in, reveling in the tightness and heat. The most Oswald could do was whimper as Harvey slowly fucked him open, one inch at a time. He didn't stop until he was in to the hilt, his hips pressed against Oswald's.

“You okay?” Harvey asked, stroking Oswald's hip with one hand. When he didn't get a response, he looked up.

Oswald was completely limp across the desk, head tilted back to expose the bruises Harvey had sucked onto his neck. He didn't respond until Harvey started to pull back, making a disgruntled sound and trying to pull him in again. When Harvey thrust back in, he _howled_. Harvey grinned and grabbed Oswald's hips for leverage.

Any worries he had about hurting Oswald died quickly. The harder Harvey fucked him, the harder he wanted it, making demands with the clench of his thighs and the cant of his hips. Harvey couldn't decide what he liked more, the greedy clutch of Oswald's body or the breathy, desperate sounds he made each time Harvey slammed into him. It was an addictive combination, as hazardous to his health as any of his vices, and that made it dangerous, but Harvey didn't give a damn about anything but the feeling of skin on skin.

Suddenly a sound splashed over him like ice water: a knock on the office door. He froze, looking up.

“Everything okay in there, boss?”

It took Harvey a moment to place the voice: Victor Zsasz. Oh, he was _fucked_. His cock didn't seem to care, though, still rock-hard inside Oswald and and impatient for more.

“Boss?”

Harvey looked down to see Oswald blink and shake himself, finally coming out of his daze. He felt a rush of smugness, to see him so undone, even if it was about to get Harvey killed.

“Everything is fine!” Oswald called, swallowing nervously. “Just dandy.”

Harvey stifled a giggle against his palm, earning a venomous glare from Oswald.

“You sure, boss?”

“Absolutely,” Oswald said. “Thank you, Victor.”

There was a long silence before Zsasz said, “Okay. Call if you need me.”

After a short eternity, Harvey finally heard footsteps receding. He sighed gratefully, wiping the sweat from his forehead.

Oswald cleared his throat.

Harvey looked down at the man spread across the desk: shirt hanging open, tie askew, naked below the waist. It was an extremely welcome sight, for all that it had nearly gotten him killed. Hell, still might. His cock throbbed, and he started to question his priorities.

“Don't worry, doll. I'm still gonna take care of you. As long as you can keep _quiet.”_

He rolled his hips forward, immediately earning a low moan from Oswald. “What'd I say?”

“I— _fuck_!” Oswald trailed off in a high-pitched whine as Harvey pulled back only to slam back in.

“Do I have to gag you?” Harvey asked.

To his surprise, Oswald's body tightened around his cock. Harvey could see his cheeks flush pink.

“You like that idea?” Harvey asked. “Open up.”

He balled the end of Oswald's tie in his fist and carefully placed it in his panting mouth.

“You good?”

Oswald nodded, and Harvey took that as permission to pull the stops out, setting a brutal pace. Even muffled against the gag, the sounds Oswald made were incredible, shocked gasps and desperate whines. But he couldn't keep it up forever. Harvey felt the orgasm building at the base of his spine, and damn if he was going to finish before Oswald.

“Let me see you come,” he growled, gripping Oswald's hips.

Oswald groaned around the gag. Harvey shifted just _so_ , making Oswald's back arch and his skin break out in new sweat. He pounded him mercilessly, eyes fixed on Oswald's.

“Come on,” he said. “I know you wanna come for me.”

He wrapped his hand around Oswald's slick cock, watching his eyes flutter shut as Harvey jerked him.

“There's a good boy,” he whispered.

Oswald's whole body jerked, clamping so tight Harvey could barely fuck him through it, covering them both in pearly strands of come. The sound Oswald made was inhuman, muffled as it was through the gag, and Harvey wondered what it would be like to let let him scream it out.

Maybe next time.

Harvey pushed the thought aside as he brought Oswald down with slow, even strokes. Finally Oswald shifted and seemed to notice he was still impaled on Harvey's cock. His eyes narrowed as he pulled the gag out of his mouth.

“You aren't finished yet,” he accused.

“Well—”

Oswald's eyes gleamed. “No wonder the Gotham police can't close a case, if you leave every job half done.”

 _You little shit,_ he thought, smirking.

“Just giving you a chance to catch your breath, princess.”

Without warning, he pulled back and _slammed_ into Oswald, pinning him in place with a grip on his hips. When Oswald cried out, Harvey stuffed the gag into his mouth one-handed before impaling him on his cock again. He drank in the small, breathless sounds Oswald made as he plowed into him.

“Still not satisfied?” Harvey asked.

Oswald groaned, throwing his head back and pushing against Harvey's grip.

“You take it so well,” Harvey told him. “Like you were made for this. You want me to come in you?”

Oswald nodded frantically, moaning around the gag.

“You asked for it, sweetheart.”

Harvey hauled Oswald so he was nearly hanging off the desk, fucking into him fast and without finesse, just the pure raw desperation of someone who's been holding on too long. Oswald's thighs gripped him, bare skin rubbing against his clothes.

When he looked up, Oswald's eyes were fixed on his face, burning with need. The sight sent Harvey over the edge, swearing and gripping Oswald's hips as he came.

When he could breathe again, he scooped Oswald off the desk and sagged onto the floor. Oswald gave a startled squawk but relaxed in his arms, head pillowed on Harvey's shoulder. He melted as Harvey plucked out the gag and pulled off the condom, knotting it and tossing it in a random direction. Harvey ran a hand down his shoulder.

The boy was _wrecked_ , he thought with a surge of pride. Worn out, covered in sweat, without a single thought in his pretty little head. Harvey couldn't help but preen a little bit as he stroked Oswald's thighs.

It was around this time that the enormity of what they'd done hit Harvey. With his luck, Oswald would probably have him taken out back and shot, once he could do things like standing and walking without looking like he'd just been fucked six ways to Sunday.

“You're not about to have me shot, are you?” Harvey asked, fishing in his coat pocket for the pack of cigarettes he always swore he was about to throw out. He lit it and took a drag before Oswald snatched it from him. The sight of him with a cigarette between his lips was surprisingly appealing, especially when he pursed them to blow out a stream of smoke.

“These are terrible,” Oswald said, taking another drag.

“That's what you get for stealing,” Harvey lectured, snatching the cigarette back. “That wasn't an answer.”

“I'm not having you killed,” Oswald said, rolling his eyes.

“So kind of you, princess— _ow_!”

Oswald smirked at the tooth marks he'd left in Harvey's shoulder. “I could change my mind.”

“Right. Then who'd be there to nail you through your fancy desk.”

Oswald looked up at the ceiling, considering. “I suppose I should put you on the list.”

“What list?”

“The list of people to try not to shoot,” he explained. “Mostly officers on my payroll.”

“Am I on your payroll now?”

“You could be.”

Oswald's eyes locked on his. Harvey knew he'd meant it to sound flippant, but now they were looking at each other, alone and half naked, and suddenly it meant too much.

Harvey lifted Oswald's chin for a long, deep kiss.

“You don't have to keep me on payroll for this.”

Oswald relaxed again, letting his head rest against Harvey's shoulder.

“I could summon a car for you,” he said. “Or you could stay. For the night, I mean.”

“That sounds good.”

Oswald raised his voice a bit. “Zsasz, will you—”

“Got it, boss,” the bodyguard called through the door. “Mazel tov.”

Harvey tried not to think too hard about Victor Zsasz listening to him getting his rocks off. It probably wasn't the worst thing he'd have to get used to.

 _Get used to?_ he thought, looking down at where Oswald was sprawled across his chest.

He pictured himself getting up, cleaning himself off, and leaving. Let Jim deal with Cobblepot from now on. It wasn't like he'd made a commitment. Someone else could have this with Oswald, could hold his bony frame against their chest.

He dropped that line of thought completely.

“You got a bedroom somewhere around here?” Harvey asked.

“That involves moving,” Oswald told him, tucking his head under Harvey's chin and gripping his lapels.

“I could carry you.”

Oswald licked his lips. “Is that so, detective?”

Harvey always knew his mouth would catch up with him someday, but maybe that wasn't so bad.

 


End file.
